Beauty is in the eye of the beholder but inner beauty is transcendent

by Joanna D'Angelo

I'm sure many of you have heard/read about the People Magazine issue of Heidi Montag's 10 plastic surgery procedures - along with the before and after pics - well - the before pics aren't quite "before" as she'd already had several procedures done.  I'm not sure what to make of it - if indeed it is as she says - her attempt at gaining control over her own insecurities or a manifestation of her obsession about her looks or just another publicity stunt that she and her reality TV husband have concocted to get more media attention.

I admit to having watched The Hills in the past.  You may scoff at that - but I watch a variety of TV shows because - well, I'm always researching and thinking of ideas - and you have to watch TV to work in it.  I remember I was at a TV festival once and a TV producer - said, "Oh, I never watch TV." She was quite disdainful about it too. Why bother working in TV then, if you dislike it so much? Novelists read books. Filmmakers watch movies.  I just shake my head at that.  But I digress.

The two most "love to hate" characters on The Hills are  - of course - Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt.  Like most reality show stars - they have become famous for doing absolutely nothing - well aside from being on TV.  At least on shows like The Amazing Race and American Idol - the stars are actually doing something.  But what Heidi and Spencer - or "Speidi" as they are known in the tabloids  - are good at - is getting attention.  They are always "on" in search of the paparazzi spot light. In fact they even wrote a book about how to be famous.  So, I do have to wonder at the planning that went into Heidi's big surgery reveal. Was it all part of their ongoing narrative or is this a real issue for her? Maybe a little of both. 

I'm focusing on  Heidi Montag's surgery in this post because - she is - for want of a better phrase - a kind of "role model" for young girls. Young girls watch The Hills - and are influenced by the styles, attitudes and actions of the young people featured on the show.  So when one of its stars takes such drastic action to alter her entire body - how can that not impact even some of the girls around the world who watch the show? Heidi is a 23 year-old woman. 23 years old. That's the age when everything looks pretty much as it should. And yet she disliked the way she looked. So after multiple surgeries she is now a 23 year old who - I'm sad to say no longer looks 23 years old.  Meanwhile, her husband Spencer gets to play with his living Barbie doll.

I know, it sounds like I'm judging Heidi - but I'm not.  Even if it figured into a publicity stunt - the point is she went through an enormous physical transformation that I think is a result of a terrible sadness inside of her.  Something has to be broken inside for a young woman of 23 to want to change so much about herself on the outside.  And truth be told,  I have mixed feelings about cosmetic surgery. On the one hand - I believe that such an extreme approach can be unhealthy both physically and mentally and I have to question the ethics of the cosmetic surgeons who perform such procedures.  On the other hand - is it so wrong for someone who has really bad teeth to get them fixed? Or to minimize terrible acne scars?  I had a friend in high school who had cystic acne  - and she was very uncomfortable with how her skin looked.  Or what if you had a really big nose? Another girl in my high school  got herself a nose job.  She had a great big ol' bump in her nose and she had it removed one summer. When school started in the fall she looked much better without the bump in her nose- although she was still one of the  most annoying girls in school. Oh, she also became quite conceited as well.  I guess in her case - the nose job only brought out the ugliness inside of her.  I made a short comedy video inspired by that years ago.  Except the protagonist was a guy and we used a clown nose to illustrate our point. It was a very shticky comic piece - called A Nose For Beauty. 

Someone very close to me had a nose job a few years ago - she had always hated her nose - felt it was too broad at the bottom. She had no problem with the rest of her face - just her nose. So she had it thinned.  She didn't like how it turned out so she had a second procedure.  Now, years later I don't really notice a difference - perhaps there is a difference - but she's still the same person to me  - both inside and out. I've always hated my nose as well - perhaps that's too strong a word. But being Italian - well big noses run in my family. There are two kinds - the big romanesque nose with the bump/hook/bend - some of my cousins have that one.  And then the chubby (kiddie-looking) nose which runs in my immediate family. Thanks Dad! Cute nose as a kid.  Not so cute as a grown up.  I shouldn't whine about it - because quite frankly it's not a big deal. I mean the real problem in my family is the lousy sinuses we all seem to have - wreaks havoc when anyone gets the slightest cold.

A friend told me once that she thought I had a nose like Kate Winslet...before her nose job. WHAAA?!?! My dear Kate Winslet had a nose job? Noooooo...... She's supposed to be the hold out. One of the "real" women in Hollywood who talks freely about stretch marks and her breasts "running for sanctuary" when she lies on her back and being happy with her curves and all of that wonderful real woman stuff.

I've always loved Kate Winslet.  She reminds me of one of my dearest friends who shares the same name.  Not because they look alike - but because they're both good at "taking the piss" as my friend says.  They're both from Reading, England - both went to the same school - only a couple of years apart. And they both knew each other by reputation. I won't go into details - but let's just say they were lively girls in their youth.  I've loved Kate Winslet ever since Heavenly Creatures.  So when, I saw the before and after pics, my heart fell. It's subtle but it's there. But I refuse to judge her. I adore her in fact  - not just because of her awesome talent but because she is one of the few actors who really strives to stay "normal" - stay true to herself in the weirdness that is Hollywood.

There are people who have been in terrible accidents or fires whose faces have become disfigured beyond recognition. I remember watching an episode of Oprah (yeah, so what) about one such woman. A drunk driver smashed into her car, triggering an explosion/fire that burned her face and body.  And no matter how many cosmetic surgeries she went through - her face was drastically changed forever.  How then does the notion of beauty apply to someone whose face has literally melted away? What are you left with?  That's when true beauty kicks in. Oh, it's easy to say that when you've not had to suffer through that kind of experience. But think about it for a moment.  While the rest of us whine and complain about our noses, pimples, wrinkles etc...there are a very select few people who have no choice but to look inside themselves and decide - either to live by a code of inner beauty or to live in shadows and despair. In so doing they transcend their bodies - transcend the physical - they are beyond us. They are enlightened beings. I shall have to remind myself about that the next time I whine about my nose.

I'm interested to hear your thoughts about any of this. What do you think about Heidi Montag's big transformation or Hollywood's obsession with cosmetic surgery or the search for inner beauty?

My friend @squozed wrote a thoughtful piece about looks/cosmetic surgery last week.  You can check it out here: squozedtoo.