The Doubt Demon and Her Ugly Head
So I’ve got thirty four days to finish edits on a first draft novella, and write a synopsis and query for it. And of course now that the real work is here, gone is the muse infused frantic need to get the story down. Now I probe for my muse and all I see is a jumble of words that seem like if they were cleaned up would make a nice story, but somehow I can’t bring my muse out of hiding. She’s prob
ably shopping for new doorknocker earrings I imagine. Or yet another pair of shoes she doesn’t need. Instead of the energy and glimmer of hope and light, all I see is the cloud of doom 
looming over my head. That’s right, the Doubt Demon. So funny she’s always more than happy to show up to the party and ruin it for everyone. What? You don’t recognize her? She’s that sloppy drunk friend at the club or a party who sees you about to get the number of a really cute guy then proceeds to throw up all over your three hundred dollar shoes you could barely afford. (I know that hasn’t just happened to me before)
So in addition to all my writing duties, I have to fight this hepher off as she tells me that I’m insane to think I can complete this much work in this much time. She likes to tell me I was insane to become a writer anyway and I really should go back to watching Real Housewives of Atlanta and Burn Notice and forget all about my little book. Because after all, it’s not like it’s any good.
So far I’ve tried flame throwers, setting my pooch, Onyx on her, and shoving her in the closet. 
My next move is a sand blaster, though I fear for my living room. That doubt demon is quick and slippery.
I know many a writer struggle to evict this elusive tenant. Even those who are wildly successful forever think, “What if the last success was just a fluke? What if I can’t do this?”
At the end of the day, as a writer our one job is to persevere and get the story out, even if you have to coax it out of your muse with stupidly expensive shoes you can’t afford.
Anyone have a good suggestion for how to get rid of the Doubt Demon?
You can't evict it entirely, but you can banish it to the attic or basement every once in a while. Just think of all the positive things writing has added to your life: the joy of diving into research when you have that inkling of an idea, the fire that takes hold when you start writing and begin almost living the characters' lives, that awesome power of creation and the feeling of accomplishment when you've finished a first draft. Editing can be tedious and it can be revealing of all our flaws, but then we can do some plastic surgery, rip out what's not functional or beautiful and embellish what is. Also, think of the common bond you have with fellow writers. We all go through this, constantly.
ReplyDeleteNana - great post! :D I think you need to get a new muse. One who recognizes the talent in you and who supports and sometimes kicks you in the butt to get back at it! She's like your best friend who always listens to your boyfriend troubles and who - if you get drunk at a party - will always keep you safe from the lothario and then drive you home. ;) She's the one you should listen to. She's got your back. ;) Great post!
ReplyDeleteI like to bribe the demon. If you offer cookies or a good cup of coffee, it usually hides for a while. Then if that doesn't work, threaten to point at it wiht a cannon. That worked for me! I finished NaNo last year because of the threats. :) Good luck. Great post.
ReplyDeleteI fight the doubt demon every single day! the trick, I think, to get rid of its nefarious rambles is just to write, and keep on writing. At some point, the 'good' writing will just click through and you'll be on your way, Doubt Demon banished to the side of the road and hoeplessly begging for an autostop ride.
ReplyDeleteOf course, next time you pick up the pen (or stick to the keyboard), Doubt Demon will have made the trip back to you, but just keep on writing, until you leave her on the side road again.
Thanks Deborah! I like thinking of edits as plastic surgery. Making something hopefully beautiful out of something raw.
ReplyDeleteNana
Joanna, Lol. I do need a muse who will keep me away from the Lothario at a party when I'm drunk. My current one just tells me to go for it and that it will make a great story.
ReplyDeleteNana
Ooh, thanks Sara! I had not tried a Cannon. Just the afore mentioned flamethrower.
ReplyDeleteNana
Zee, you're so right. Maybe the keyboard is Doubt Demon's Kryptonite.
ReplyDeleteNana
Love the post, Nana!
ReplyDeleteThere's not much I can add to this, as there are already so many helpful responses...all of which I can relate.
That query and synopsis writing is a drain. Finding the right words to represent your story in it's best light is a challenge, and can drain anyone of any belief they have even a shred of writing ability.
But when it all comes together, a major sense of accomplishment will out weight those feeling of doubt...and soon you'll be back on track. Or, at least, that's how it works for me xxx
GOOD LUCK with your submissions.