Top Five Reasons I'm Going to Miss Watching Medium

by Chiron O'Keefe

Two networks, five years, seven seasons and 125 episodes later, the not-quite-a-hit show, Medium is giving up the ghost.

Hmmm. Do you think psychic, Allison Dubois saw it coming?






I became a reluctant viewer when my hair stylist raved about the series and persuaded me to give it a try. It's corny, it's cheesy, it's irresistible snack-food television. Empty calories, hydrogenated oily charm, and just enough flavor enhancer to make me believe I'm watching a real show.



My husband bitches, whines and groans through each episode, which now that I think about it, reminds me of the main character, Allison Dubois, played with scenery-chewing fervor by Patricia Arquette. Can't really blame her. The scripts are deliciously bizarre which leads me to…




Reason Number One: Crazy-ass story-lines!


Allison switches bodies with a man in a coma, who rambles up to the family home clothed in a hospital gown!

She switches bodies with bratty middle child, Bridgette!

She falls into Zombie Land! She channels psycho killers and screaming victims! Yet even though mild-mannered…er…manic-depressive housewife/D.A. consultant usually comes off as a screaming lunatic, her dreams don't lie. She earnestly defends her psychic visions no matter how freaking ridiculous. Ah, but those visions do seem a little far-fetched which is why…

Reason Number Two:

District Attorney Manuel Devalos, gruff Detective Lee Scanlon or devoted husband Joe Dubois will always doubt her. That's right. The lady's been spouting off for half a decade with an accuracy that led to her becoming an official paid member of the team. But each episode requires proof that her dream visions are real.



D.A. "Manny" Devalos will look appropriately grim and say something like, "Allison, I want to believe you." (heavy sigh) "But surely you can see the difficult position I'm in." Or he'll shake his head and say, "Maybe you're right, Allison. Maybe the fire chief and local hero is a contract killer, but what can I do? My hands are tied. Without proof, what can I do?"

Um, excuse me, Manny, but isn't that your job? Isn't that why you have a freaking police force at your disposal? You get the proof. Jeez, it's not like the woman has ever gotten a full night's sleep, after all. Which leads to…



Reason Number Three:


Joe Dubois. Played by the yummy Jake Weber (former joint roller for the Rolling Stones). The ever-so-patient hubby who puts up with his high-maintenance psychic wife's creepy transformations and continual nightmares.



I'm surprised she hasn't yet dreamt of her own death at the hands of her sleep deprived hubby.



Since Allison wakes him constantly, Joe is often seen wearing boxer shorts and a t-shirt, getting into heated arguments with his wife in the middle of the night. But… but… the children are sleeping! How can they argue without waking the whole family?



Reason Number Four:

The classic whispered argument.

I have to admit, I love it. It's so predictable that it could practically be a drinking game. Each week, these two will battle it out in loud stage whispers. Sometimes even when their children (who surprisingly haven't turned to drugs yet) are sleeping peacefully between them in bed.


Reason Number Five:

The family drama.

Interspersed with the insane murderers hacking their victims to bloody bits are serious issues. Ariel has a crush on a boy! Who (thanks to crazy mama's dream visions) just might be a maniacal killer! What's a mother to do?



Ah, Medium. You will be missed. Are there any Medium fans out there? Or perhaps there's another show that has the same silliness factor? Do share!

--Chiron O'Keefe

Chiron experienced her first lucid dream at the age ten, luckily without involving any serial killers or screeching victims. Friend her on Facebook.